I’m four weeks post surgery and so far so good. As far as I know the surgery went well, or so I’m told. Every day is an improvement on the day before and since nerve pain takes a long time to heal I am still experiencing some minor, remnant issues. In the first week I had a rough time climbing steps, getting up and down from a chair or the bed. All of those little things we do all day and don’t even notice. After major surgery, you notice.
I’m still not allowed to lift anything heavier than 10-15 pounds, twist, or move suddenly. Forget about being allowed, I simply can’t do it without causing pain. Nothing sharp or show stopping like before — it’s definitely dulled down — but it’s noticeable, as in “hey dummy! Don’t do that.“
The first question I get from my running friends and acquaintances is, how soon can I run again? Probably not for a while. I just dealt with 17 months of disc herniation and pain, 17 months of damage, and a major surgery. I am in no hurry to rush my body through the motions of running. It took me a year and a half to get to this bottom point, it could easily take me just as long to get back out. I’m patient, and I am being smart. So, the short answer is, I don’t know.
One thing I do know is that all that competition is not important to me anymore. All I want is to get back out on the trails. I don’t care about pace, time, finish places, or races for that matter. Veni vidi vici. Been there, done that, and now I can move on to other things. Who knows if I’ll ever get back to my 50 mile training, and I’m not sure I even care to anymore. I knew when I started racing a few years ago that it would be short-lived anyway. I’d rather focus on providing my kids with opportunities rather taking them myself. Or let’s just say, I think I may have gotten all of that out of my system. Fun, to me, sounds more like spending a few hours on the trails with my friends, or alone for that matter, rather than handing over my money for a medal I don’t care about or a placement that means nothing to me. Not in the grand scheme of life at least.
All that matters is that I can run. I am a runner and I run.
One of these days …
I find it interesting that you knew your racing would be short-lived, you seemed so into it at the time. I hope it has nothing to do with age, although it seems like all runners, regardless of age, end up injured at some point.
I won’t say I hope you’re soon back to your old self, since it seems like your heart lies elsewhere, although of course I hope the surgery heals soon. I think I understand, to some extent, since I am over my significant injury, but for some reason just don’t want to do what I did in the past.
Now I just want to do the bare minimum to stay in good aerobic condition, keep the weight off, etc.
I’m always being asked to volunteer at races, and I do that whenever I can, but that is very weird for me. For some strange reason, volunteering leaves me feeling very unfulfilled. It’s not like I’m the type of person looking for recognition or anything either, such as expecting to hear “Oh, thank you so much for helping us out, we couldn’t pull this off without people like you and blah blah,” because I’m not.
Other things upset me though. Just last weekend I volunteered at a 5K water station. I saw the leader coming, and you know how you get first impressions of people? Well, he was all hairy, insanely ahead of the next guy, and even had a look on his face like he was fresh as running a 50 Yard dash. I mean EVERYBODY is at least SUPPOSED to look somewhat tired, so I couldn’t help but think “This guy HAS to be jacked up on steroids or something.”
When I handed him a cup of water, he yelled like some kind of primal beast and apparently tried to dump it on his head, but it went right over the top and nailed me straight in the face. I had this incredible urge to tackle him and take him out of the race, but of course I didn’t do that. I’m assuming he won the race, but didn’t stick around to find out when my job was done.
Such is life lately.
Hi! Long time no contact. Glad to hear your surgery went well. Running (or any activity) for activity sake is perfectly fine. I think we can get so caught up in performance, tracking, and results that we forget to take the time to enjoy what we are doing. I love trail running, snow shoeing and hiking to give me that ‘at one with nature’ experience and take my time doing it. :)